Tuesday, April 4, 2017

Dizzy in Dallas


This past weekend, I went to Dallas/Fort
Worth. The trip was sightseeing envy, but being on a tight timeframe, I was unable to participate in a lot of hands-on activities. But, the trip kept me on my toes and apparently, a brighter-looking appearance, but still, dread loomed over me.

For too long a time, I've longed for a change of scenery. I found my stay in Maryland quite pleasant last year and North Carolina, keep my hopes up because I'm comin' for ya. Speaking of which, another worthy win from North Carolina for this year's March Madness tournament (yes, I watch occasionally).  Dallas is architecturally aesthetic- sophisticated and pleasing to the eye. Fort Worth city planning is adequate, but the weather in this area is never too hot.

Got an hour to finish a packet of free-response questions and outlining a review for Masters of Sex S2. No matter what time of day it is, stay hydrated and piss. I learned that I am dazed and confused often. However, I won't announce my confusion because I'd feel like a prim, uptight backseat rider. I try to uphold an image
¯\_(ツ)_/¯


When was I dizzy on this trip? For one, I overestimated my coordination skills when it comes to heights. I went rock-wall climbing, maybe 20 feet. My estimation skills are never up-to-par. The feeling of everything collapsing in emerged after two pulls. Yet, I kept climbing.. and began to pant and panic. I could do the splits, but I didn't dare use flexibility in my round. Eventually, I hit the buzzer. But I didn't let go, on my way down. My hands were shaking even after the harnesses were taken off.

  A gentle rainy morning on Sunday called for a reflection. So I did. Stared out the window on the charter bus, put on my hood, and put on some hiphop heartbreak songs. I put this on for a desired vibe.. soothe melancholic episodes. I have had no emotional consequences yet. I immerse myself by singing along and I imagine.. a warm embrace, an improvised road trip, fulfilling Justin Timberlake's vision in "My Love," one happiness that's been only in my dreams. Another being my 'dream birthday party' for next year or so. And that's where I go crazy- there are things that I struggle to accept as a part of reality, but do I still have time to grow? Yeah, we all do. I wept for a few minutes. It's all in my thoughts.